You know, I try and keep the details of my job off of this blog because I don't want to get dooced like blogger Heather B Armstrong did a few years back. I like my job. I have no issue with it whatsoever UNTIL they screw me over on my taxes.
No, my grievances on this years taxes are NOT about King George's draconian policies that favour the rich over the poor. They are instead directed at my employer. In many ways they have topped our leader through carelessness.
How? Someone misread my tax information and claimed that I listed 7, yes 7, dependents on my taxes when in reality I listen one; MYSELF!!!! Now some of you may think, "Oh they must have read your 1 as a 7. If you think that, then you're wrong! Don't believe me? Look at a standard W-4 form here. Notice that the only way I can come up with 7 is if I place a 1 next to each line or specifically list 7 in line D. You know, the line that's asking about my dependents which basically means kids. Yeah that's right, KIDS which I don't fucking have or want! The ones many of you are raising right now. Those kids. And if I did have brats it wouldn't be that many because my name isn't Kevin fucking Federline NOR am I one of those Latin guys that knocks up hoochie mamas in between drug runs in the hood. If that were the case, I'd have gold teeth and my name would be Jesus! That's pronounced Hay-soos for those of you non Latin folk out there and Hay-soos would probably be too dumb to do my job.
I DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS! PERIOD!!!
Bottom line here is that because of this "inaccuracy" I now owe thousands of dollars to the IRS and am also being fined by them. Of course those who keep track of this stuff at my current employer have helped me correct the situation but have offered little in the way of, at the very least, apologising for the mistake. I think it fair that they at least help out with the fine. But as with most of these companies, they'll just find a way to twist things around so that in the end it's all your fault even though you did everything right. They'll claim it's in the best interest of the company and then turn around and offer a golden parachute to a high level executive who helped drive that company into the ground. Corporate logic is always good for a laugh, but this time I'm not laughing.
My wish for 2007? That the people handling this stuff learn how to read W-4's. Sorry guys but you blew this one, not me and I'll tell it like it is because outside of the office this is my blog and my rules.
Disclaimer: Ricardo holds no grudges against Latinos as he himself is one nor does he hold any grudges against his employer or people named Jesus. He's just mad and this too shall pass.
Still to come on U N L O A D E D, I answer Maritza's burning questions and give an unsure send off to the father who never was.
