Comments on U N L O A D E D: The Apron

ICK!!!!! One of my boy's best buddies pushed him ...

2009-11-04T19:20:00.244-05:00

ICK!!!!!

One of my boy's best buddies pushed him over and broke my boy's front permanent tooth on a urinal at school. My boy was incredibly upset, not that his permanent tooth was broken, but that his mouth had hit the urinal. Apparently that whole not looking man etiquette has to be finessed some in the early years.

STG - Looking for the "bread" helps too :-) Wha...

2009-11-04T15:10:02.515-05:00

STG - Looking for the "bread" helps too :-)

What an ordeal it was to see that fiasco in the restroom.

x.dell - Pine Sol wasn't a better alternative?

Well, there's at least salt on the apron. And the...

2009-11-04T02:50:24.608-05:00

Well, there's at least salt on the apron. And the ammonium will break down into ammonia and water--both of which are used in cleaning.

If that's any comfort.

Or is it that you always try to find the breast......

2009-11-03T01:51:36.024-05:00

Or is it that you always try to find the breast... oops, I mean the best in any situation?

Good job on the story, loved it.

stg

Dawn - You like that? :-) Thomas - Yes, it would ...

2009-10-31T15:52:26.133-04:00

Dawn - You like that? :-)

Thomas - Yes, it would make perfect sense to have the better washing solution in the kitchen itself for efficiencies sake.

I suppose even showing him this would have not satisfied him. Fuck him!!!

Tracey I always try to find the silver lining no matter what.

Ewwww.... for a story that started out so badly, I...

2009-10-30T07:39:33.378-04:00

Ewwww.... for a story that started out so badly, I'm glad you were able to find some happiness at the end! ;)

I once had a customer threaten to call the police ...

2009-10-29T13:41:30.281-04:00

I once had a customer threaten to call the police on my old restaurant if I did not summon one of my cooks and have him demonstrate to the guest his hand-washing technique.

Apparently the cook and the guest had been in the restroom only moments before and my employee had left the bathroom without washing up.

What the guest failed to understand, nay to even believe, is that we had a special hand washing station in the dish pit that featured high-pressure, high-temperature water, hard bristled scrub brushes and anti-bacterial soap so powerful it could eat through aluminum foil.

We often had employees not wash in the bathroom in favor of using the more sanitary facilities in the back.

The guy would not be consoled and so I relegated him to the category of asshole.

... and in such a creative way. :-)

2009-10-29T12:48:10.564-04:00

... and in such a creative way. :-)

ric, i was thinking you were gonna say ..."and whe...

2009-10-29T00:57:16.979-04:00

ric, i was thinking you were gonna say ..."and when i turned around he had turned into a bat for halloween & flown out the window."

SJ these unspeakable things you are going on about...

2009-10-28T09:43:00.707-04:00

SJ these unspeakable things you are going on about. This woman can be a wife! A mother! :)

Devin what you are saying makes me very fearful about ever eating out again. In the TGI Friday's, Pondorosa Steak House sense of the term.

MD - That is not efficient for men, too time consuming. Urinals are essential.

Mitzi I guess my question is how did you treat the regulars who were people you liked and never gave a fuss. Were they spared? I never understood why people treat the staff of any eatery harshly as they can do anything to retaliate.

K9 It was too much noise and movement to not look at what the fuck was going on. And the guy looked like a person out of a David Lynch flick. I loved Twin Peaks BTW. I was in love with Shelly the waitress.

into = intro

2009-10-27T18:31:43.826-04:00

into = intro

very twin peaks like into. i really did LOL at the...

2009-10-27T18:31:02.997-04:00

very twin peaks like into. i really did LOL at the parachute deploying imagery. indeed that is a big ass peripheral i would have to look too.

i read on...the wall street circle jerk, ballon boy's parents are cocksuckers. yep, yep. we're in full agreement on it ALL.

to cap off my economic shit storm - somebody stole my credit card number and ordered a bunch of shit on the internet. now i have reams of paperwork to complete to avoid being charged. what a grand time. enjoy the redhead. i think i will have a gimlet.

I have never understood the function (or disfuncti...

2009-10-27T10:42:53.532-04:00

I have never understood the function (or disfunction) of urinals. Why can't men pee in peace in toilets?

Anyway, I pee after a meal, never before, otherwise I will never eat out. Yikes!

Flapping frabric at the urinal is too much. In Ind...

2009-10-27T08:05:05.128-04:00

Flapping frabric at the urinal is too much. In India they don't often bother with the urinal when the side of the street will do just fine.

SJ is a kinky bastard with good strategies.

I would brave germs for a redhead and food poisoining for a decent baldie.

Back in my days as a bartender at a certain fancy pointy roofed white music venue, native rodentials feasted on our bar snacks. Bon apetit.

hahahahaha:) you always have such a great sense of...

2009-10-26T21:43:52.583-04:00

hahahahaha:) you always have such a great sense of humor Ricardo!! foam and nursemyra and others were funny too-man that is disgusting about the apron -having worked in food service so much in the past I know conditions are far from ideal -haha I kinda say a little prayer to not get food poisoning when i eat out!!! best as always my friend and I will try to get caught up with your blog -way behind-have been offline a lot lately too due to exhaustion which doesnt help-all the best!!

1. Kidnap the bar maid 2. Go home 3. Get her to op...

2009-10-26T21:27:43.421-04:00

1. Kidnap the bar maid
2. Go home
3. Get her to open the fridge and make her pour drinks for you.
4. Well you are a grown man and can figure the rest out.

PS: chain her to the fridge if you don't want to repeat step 1 everyday.

Kat - "Yeah...but you left out the part where you ...

2009-10-26T16:43:55.987-04:00

Kat - "Yeah...but you left out the part where you went home and masturbated for world peace..."

SAVAGE!! That was between us and the twitterverse :P

This video is dead on this is all you ever need to know and why.

Yeah...but you left out the part where you went ho...

2009-10-26T16:03:51.437-04:00

Yeah...but you left out the part where you went home and masturbated for world peace...

i find mens restroom etiquette hilarious:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw

women don't seem to have bathroom etiquette as detailed as that...except maybe that no peeing in the sink thing i got in trouble for once...hey, you gotta do what you gotta do...

Grant for a second I thought you'd ask me to get o...

2009-10-26T12:58:23.870-04:00

Grant for a second I thought you'd ask me to get over the phobia by letting the hot waitress give me a golden shower.

Foam - And I will gladly take her, run her under the tap and drink the beer off her!! To hell with glasses.

Scarlett- I would have been lead away by security if it were Eva, those would not be fires in me but explosions. LOL! I would have gone mad. Isn't it sick how this mad handled himself? And I'm a customer!! I could have reported him. I guess it is like Seinfeld.

Terra- perhaps would did her own apron into something if she were on staff, my goodness!!

Nursemyra trying to send the Ricardo into fits of lust, someone turn on the cold shower.

Leah - You gotta watch out for these guys!!!

I will lose about 15 lbs from reading this post. T...

2009-10-26T09:14:05.078-04:00

I will lose about 15 lbs from reading this post. THANK YOU!!

Ha, this reminded me of the Seinfeld episode too! ...

2009-10-26T03:32:19.968-04:00

Ha, this reminded me of the Seinfeld episode too!

remind me to greet you at the airport in just my apron when you finally make it out to Oz

At least you're in the know... what goes on in a w...

2009-10-26T01:26:06.801-04:00

At least you're in the know... what goes on in a women's cubicle remains there!

Was the waitress named Eva Herzigova?? ;) This re...

2009-10-25T21:13:27.413-04:00

Was the waitress named Eva Herzigova?? ;)

This reminded me of an episode of Seinfeld, and yes, I can see how you'd feel uncomfortable (especially if you were ordering pizza or something where he had to put his hands directly into the food). It turns my stomach just thinking about it.

I'm glad his shift was over when all this happened. I will never look at a male restaurant cook in an apron the same way again, thanks to this post. :)

i'll take those two large foaming beers .. you can...

2009-10-25T19:59:49.727-04:00

i'll take those two large foaming beers ..
you can have the redhead ..

To help further cure your phobia, I peed on this c...

2009-10-25T19:16:35.910-04:00

To help further cure your phobia, I peed on this comment. Lick it, and your fears will have been confronted.