I'm begging you, all in the media: Leave me the fuck alone with the ups and downs of Jon and Kate. I DON'T CARE!!!!
Some of you may be wondering who Jon and Kate are, I had no idea who they were until the media decided I HAD to know about them and their extramarital affairs! Jon is banging an old friend and Kate is doing her bodyguard according to reports. Not only do I have to know about that, but I have to get bombarded with paparazzi photos of Kate on the beach with her eight kids and take note of the cosmetic surgery she had on her stomach every time I'm at the grocery store. Now I am bombarded with images of Kate slapping one of her kids around. What am I supposed to do about this? Why must I know? It's not nice, but please!! Let me come up for air!!!
Rise to Prominence
Apparently before the silly, self absorbed Octomom, there was Kate. Long story short, Jon and Kate had infertility issues and after going buck wild with fertility treatments, they had twins. But that wasn't enough. Jon and Kate wanted more. Screw adoption! Let's go buck wild with fertility treatments, AGAIN! Kate became pregnant with 6 kids in one shot and presto, they got a reality show. Wait, did I just say, reality show? Ah, that's why I have to know about them. They have a reality show! Silly me.
Each week we can follow Jon, Kate and the family doing familial things like vacations and big media tours. We need to "understand them." Hey, that's entertainment. Right?
End the Show!!
I would have been more than happy to let Jon and Kate go about their lives in front of the camera, potentially exploiting their innumerable children, but now it's personal. You have made my time in grocery store checkout lines uncomfortable. You have made big news outlets like CNN turn into TMZ.
Yes, America loves their tabloid distractions but when I purposefully avoid them and still get an ear and eyeful, something is wrong. And this one doesn't just fall on the media's shoulders, you two are getting off on the attention. It's why you made yourselves celebrities, right? It was never about us "understanding" you. It was about being in awe of you because you had tons of kids and that made you special. You wanted us to genuflect at your alter of self righteousnesses and fertility. To the women out there that think having kids makes them all knowing and godly, you're not. But you just might be a self obsessed wench with a sick need for validation via your hatchings.
Some people are calling for an end to the show for the sake of the children but not me. I want it to end so I can finally get relief from from the both of you. However part of me is tempted to watch your marital implosion unfold for nothing more than my own sick satisfaction. You have caused me pain and now I will revel in yours.
