Sentimental things come in all shapes and sizes. There's really no limit to what they can be as the human mind will place a connection to something and then build up from there. Attached to these objects may be memories of better times, a reminder of someone special or a sense of security to get you through the day. Odd how a tattered article of clothing or a rabbits foot or a stuffed animal from your childhood can suddenly bring back a rush of feelings that seem to empower you. But do they really?
The year 2000 was the worst period of my life ever. I lost everything and wound up homeless. I recall having to haul all of my possessions to a dumpster and throw them out, one by one. Among them were many sentimental objects that I thought I simply couldn't live without. Among them were my old Atari 2600 and the games I used to play on them as a kid, my Commodore 64 computer that I played as a kid, my music collection on vinyl and cassette. What wasn't thrown out was sold off like my old bike that I had so many adventures on as a kid. How dare does some other punk buy it and use it to have his own adventures on. It was mine damn it!!!!
The dumpster incident was excruciating but there was simply no room for them in my new surroundings which we can call oblivion. I had no idea where I was going to wind up and could only carry what could fit into my car. That was it. I felt like part of me and my identity was dying with each object tossed away. Who was I without these "things?" The answer became clear in the years that followed. A survivor who would, in his darkest moments, be strangely liberated from the material and forced to fight and forge an identity from nothing more than his will. There would be no trademark articles of clothing. No special good luck charms. Nothing to cling to except for me.
To many of you this may sound bleak and I assure you that it was. I am not saying that I don't miss these objects but the lesson I learned from them is simple: Don't let your junk own you.
Junk?
Yes that right I called sentimental things junk. Rubbish, trash! They are objects that facilitated fun but they may not have been the source of fun or comfort or security. The source is not the object, it's you. Do we wish to have a tangible thing to hold that makes our memories more vivid? Perhaps, yes. But in the objectifying we tend to place or give too much power over them. I have seen numerous adults cling to things to the point that it defies reason. They are paralyzed by the thought of making a trip without the object or keeping it in a certain place in their house because...well they can't even give you a straight answer. And don't you dare try to explain that it's not as big of a deal they think. That will start a war.
You are insensitive, you don't understand, you have no respect.
Keeping a Level Head
Naturally there are some things that simply can't be replaced like a gift from a dear relative that has passed or something that a friend gave you before going off to the other side of the world. Maybe the object is something you discovered and clung to after a very traumatic event. It's all quite understandable really. But would you believe the answer to this is in a film that was fun to watch but low on substance? What was that film? Top Gun.
What!??!
Yeah, I know, it's weird but hear me out on this. The Maverick character (Tom Cruise) is a flying ace and his buddy Goose (Anthony Edwards) is his co-pilot and best friend. The 2 have a terrible mishap in their F-14 where the engines give out and they go into free fall. After desperate attempts to right the plane they eject. Maverick is thrown safely from from harms way but Goose is killed when his head smashes into the cockpit window, snapping his neck. Maverick feels responsible for the death of Goose and holds onto his id tags (dog tags for you military folk) and brings them with him on each flight. We think as the viewer that this will empower Maverick to fly higher than he ever did before. It doesn't. It cripples his ability and his Top Gun teammates begin to wonder what's going on with him.
In the films final moments Maverick, standing on the deck of an an aircraft carrier, gives one final look at the dog tags of his fallen friend and throws them out into the sea. This was not a gesture of forgetting about his friend, but letting go of an object that he gave to much power to. Goose lives on in his memory and heart. He does not need the tags to properly honor him.
We Keep Holding On
The human mind will always try and make something tangible out of certain intangible things. It's why we hold onto these objects. Even after writing this, I may pick up a few sentimental things myself and bask in their comfort before realizing that it's not the object that can give me comfort. It's me, it's you, it's all of us.And that is more powerful than anything material thing you can hold onto.
Coming up next on U N L O A D E D.......
The nightmare log. I'll recount my nightly, vivid and strange dreams that I've been having as of late. They're lots of fun.
